Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
