Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
