My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If I die, sorry about rent.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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