Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
