I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize