What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
