And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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