i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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