He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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