i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
