Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
whose parrot is this?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
