u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
