he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
