It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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