using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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