then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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