I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Pooping to opera.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
