I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
