$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Drunk is not a location!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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