Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I just want to make out with him forever
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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