dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Two words: blizzard sex
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize