I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
