hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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