i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i jhust puked up my retainher.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
i out mim tonsoeep
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