Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
