My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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