nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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