East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
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