Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
