you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
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