She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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