you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize