Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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