i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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