oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
