i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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