What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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