So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize