At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
