i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
The power of my boobs compel you
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
