And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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