About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize