At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
