Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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