sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
vagina is talking i cant
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
