i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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