3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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