6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Randomize
