I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
