glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
